Shopping cart

  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer
Birth in Holland

Birth in Holland

Building confidence for a better start for your family

  • Pregnancy Services
    • Midwifery Services
      • Registration for midwifery care
      • Contraception
    • Doula Services
  • Courses
    • Courses overview
    • Confident Birth
    • Ready for baby
    • Prepare to Breastfeed
    • First Aid for Parents
    • Refresh & Reboot for birth
    • Baby Massage
    • Confident Birth Online
  • Massage
  • About us
    • Meet the team
    • Locations
    • Gallery
  • Blog
  • Contact us
  • My account

The quiet reality of hospital birth

10 May 2018 by Sophie Bos Leave a Comment

 

“Why would I need a doula, I am giving birth in the hospital” is a statement I often hear when talking to women expecting their first baby. The truth of the matter is that if you really knew how much time you and your partner will be alone in that labouring room, you may feel differently. One of the reasons for this misunderstanding is the expectation of how physically present the hospital maternity staff are while you are in labour.

hospital-birth-doula

The reality is that upon arrival in the hospital you get a maternity nurse and a clinical midwife or resident doctor assigned to you. The nurse sporadically comes in and out to check on you or to do her routine tests. She is responsible for a number of birthing couples in other rooms at the same time and however much she may want to she cannot stay for lengths of time with you.  Even more sporadically the midwife or resident doctor are with her to check how the labour process is going. If it is very quiet on the ward then you may get some extra attention, the nurse wants to support you as well as she can, but if she has more than one birth at a time she cannot physically be in two places at once. If you are being transferred, or handed over to the hospital, by your midwife, because of a complication or the use of certain pain relief options, then she may or may not stay with you. Probably not! If you are under the care of a gynecologist for your pregnancy, because of a medical indication, then you will definitely not have continual physical support in the room with you during your labour.

The Gynecologist only comes if there is a complication. He or she is keeping an eye on your situation by looking at the computer screen in the nurses station showing your contractions and the baby’s heart rate. They are in charge of the ward and are mostly referred to outside of your room. You will likely only meet them face-to-face if you need an intervention of some sort or if the midwife needs to confer about an issue in your presence.

At any time you can call on the nurse by pressing a button that alerts them you need assistance or help and they will be there as soon as they can. But, in-between there are quite some hours that you and your partner are alone. Just the two of you!

birth-natalia-delft-doulaDuring the time you are alone with your partner, you are busy labouring in the best way you know how. You may appreciate being alone but it is also likely that your partner will feel helpless and have questions plaguing him like: Should I call the nurse now? What can I do? Isn’t it time? And, Why are they taking so long they said they would come and check again in 1 hour? What if the baby comes and no one is here? Is this normal, so much pain? He will want to support you but inside will likely feel stressed out however prepared he felt before hand. You will likely also have a variation of these questions circling around in your head at some point or another. A birth is very unpredictable and takes turns we don’t expect that can cause uncertainty and concern.

How can you prepare for those hours alone in the birthing room with just the two of you?

1 ~ Follow a birth preparation course together. This can help you and your partner know more about what to expect during the process. Your partner will feel more at ease because he knows how the process of labour works and will have learned some ways he can coach you through the process. It is very common for the pregnant woman to do a lot of reading about labour and birth but the partner is often reluctant to read or just can’t find the time to.

Why take a course as a couple?

  • There is nothing better than having your birth partner be as educated as you are!
  • It forces you to spend time together preparing mentally and emotionally for the baby and not just practically (with all those jobs and endless lists that need doing/buying     and making.)
  • Good birth preparation is worth the money and will educate and prepare you for a better birth experience.
  • Preparing alone and having your partner just come to a ‘partner session’ is (better than nothing) but not even half as effective as preparing together.
  • It will blow your partner away because he will actually enjoy it and feel better equipped for the job and that… is awesome… for you and him!!

Not… be with just the two of you!!

2 ~Hire a Doula. Consider what a difference a doula will make to your birthing experience. I know it is quite an investment but you will not regret it. What ever your birth journey ends up being, doula support will improve your outcome. She can’t guarantee your dream birth or a perfect birth but she can support you and your partner in a way that makes the whole experience a more positive and supported one.

  • A doula will be with you from beginning to end. Better still she has gotten to know you a bit in the months leading up to your birth so she feels familiar and you feel safe with her present.
  • When labour really starts to kick in she will be making sure you are comfortable, helping you find whatever position feels comfortable, massaging you, giving you sips of water. At times she may sit in the corner chair and just “be there”
  • She will help your partner feel at ease and giving him ideas of how to “be there” for you.
  • She will encourage and motivate you when you feel like you can’t go on. She will believe in you and your ability to birth your baby.
  • If interventions are advised she will help you weigh up the pros and cons and walk you through whatever is necessary to make a healthy decision.
  • You will feel safe because she is familiar with birth. During those seemingly endless hours, she understands what is going on and will tell you that what you are experiencing is normal.
  • Your partner will feel less stress because he can ask his questions as they come up and not feel the responsibility of knowing if he should or shouldn’t call the midwife or the nurse AGAIN!
  • Your doula will do all she can to keep those stress levels down. Stress will hinder the process and slow it down so she will spend time in her prenatal visits finding out what your fears are and what causes you stress so she can make sure your birthing environment FEELS safe to you, so your birthing experience will benefit.
  • A doula lightens the load and brings a dose of humour to the atmosphere bringing a sense of calm and confidence.

If you are not planning on using a doula, or even if you are, be as prepared as you can for your birth, take a course and be informed about the birthing process so you can minimize the stress and the unknown.

Filed Under: Birth, Doula support

Reader Interactions

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Primary Sidebar

birthinholland

Enjoy this special unique celebration today. Doul Enjoy this special unique celebration today. 
Doula Sophie welcomed a baby into the world in the early hours of this morning. A couple who hired her after following the Confident Birth course. Congrats to the new parents.
If this is your first Kings day in The Netherlands today, enjoy. 🎊🎉 🇳🇱 🧡
A walk a day keeps the dr away!? Well in this case A walk a day keeps the dr away!? Well in this case we are just advocating for staying fit and healthy during pregnancy. Keeping your body active helps you during labour and recovery postpartum. 
-
-
#activepregnancy #healthypregnancy #healthybirth #stayactive #awalkaday #pregnancyeducation #birthprep #activebirth
If you choose to formula feed your baby from the b If you choose to formula feed your baby from the beginning then the baby will need a small amount of formula in the first two hours after birth. 

In the hospital they have the bottles all ready for you, you don’t need to bring your own. Look how cute this inny mini bottle is.💕
-
-
#firstfeed #formulafeeding #justborn #freechoice #informedbirth #hospitalbirth
You have prepared well, you are waiting for your b You have prepared well, you are waiting for your baby. Trust that you have enough information, stay calm, enjoy your last weeks of pregnancy. 
You have got this. 
-
-
#pregnantbelly #maternityleave #waitingforbaby #birthprep #birtheducation #staycalm #enjoylife #becomingmama
And when it is done and you have your baby in your And when it is done and you have your baby in your arms, you will know it was possible, you did it and your body and mind are capable of so much more than you think. 
-
-
#strongbirthingwoman #womenarestrong #birthingtime #bodyandmind #youcandoit #strongbody #youcandohardthings #doula #prepareforbirth #birthprep #confidentbirth
A healthy period to give birth is between 37 and 4 A healthy period to give birth is between 37 and 42 weeks pregnancy. Within this time frame it is absolutely fine to have your baby. ⁠
Based on the best evidence, there is no such thing as an exact “due date,” and the estimated due date of 40 weeks is not accurate. Instead, it would be more appropriate to say that there is a normal range of time in which most people give birth. ⁠
⁠
About half of all pregnant people will go into labour on their own by 40 weeks and 5 days (for first-time mothers) or 40 weeks and 3 days (for mothers who have given birth before). The other half will not. (evidence based birth) ⁠
Only 5% give birth on the exact due date. ⁠
⁠
Baby will come when baby is ready. The wait is so worth it!⁠
-⁠
-⁠
-⁠
#duedate #duedates #babyfirst #patience #waitingforbaby #birtheducation
Our favourite ‘CONFIDENT BIRTH’ saying. - - - Our favourite ‘CONFIDENT BIRTH’ saying. 
-
-
-
#oxytocinvibes #hormones #birthhormones #stressfree #painmanagement #laboranddelivery #painreliefoptions #painmanagementsolutions #birth #labortips #doulatips #breakthepaincycle
We trust that all our preparation will pay off. - We trust that all our preparation will pay off.
-
-
#expatfamily #birthprep #englishcoursesdelft #englishcoursesrotterdam #expectinginthenetherlands #expatlife #internationals #birthcourse #delftnews #rotterdamexpats #delftmama #newinholland #pregnantinholland
Many of the expats and internationals we work with Many of the expats and internationals we work with have a mother (or both parents) come over from their home country to help around the birth period. 

The question often wrestled with is if the mother should be at the birth or not. 
The answer is always explained when we talk about hormones and what adrenaline does to the birth process. Usually the mother-to-be immediately knows the answer of how the mother(in law) would affect her stress levels during the birth. 

Its actually unusual that having your mum beside you during the birth is a helpful thing. It is possible and i have seen some amazing mums who know how to be and can separate themselves from their daughters experience but not many.

Was your mother around during your birth? 
-
-
#motherdaughter #motherinlaw #birthteam #expatparent #birthpartner #internationalliving #birthinholland #family #birthcourses #internationals #expatwoman #englishbirthcoursedelft
Midwifery in the Netherlands is unique and we need Midwifery in the Netherlands is unique and we need you desperately to help us keep it that way. 
The proposed integrated tariff for financing our maternity system will bring the primary care midwives under a monopoly controlled by the hospitals. This will bring an end to freedom of choice for pregnant women and an end to professional autonomy for midwives.

Gone will be your choice of caregiver. Gone will be the professional freedom to deliver the best care to our clients in an evidence based, excellent quality system. 

Help us keep bringing care to the community, the right care in the right place. Personal, high quality and highly accessible maternity care.

Please. Sign the petition 🙏 

https://noodalarmgeboortezorg.nl/

#verloskundigverzet
#verlostasopdestoep
#dejuistezorgopdejuisteplek
#noodalarmgeboortezorg
#midwife
#verloskunde
#tekendepetitie
#malieveld
#neetegenib
#keuzevrijheid
#uniekezorg
#petitie
#protest
No, no, never will a doula replace the partner unl No, no, never will a doula replace the partner unless that is your specific request for some reason. 

The doula and partner become a team. 

Expecting the partner to be that whole support for themselves AND the birthing partner too is hard on the partner. 

It is so important that the partner also feels supported. This is a life event for them too. Being able to give support to the birthing partner and know someone has your back too is a game changer for partners. 
-
-
#partnersupport #team #birthteam #bettertogether #dreamteam #birthpartner
Do the doula test! 2 questions to help you see if Do the doula test! 
2 questions to help you see if you would benefit from hiring a doula. 

The real answer is everyone benefits from having a doula. There are no down sides! 
-
-
#douladelft #doula #worlddoulaweek2022
#doularotterdam
#doulasupport #continualsupport #laboursupport #doulalife #birthdoula #doulalove #doulasofinstagram #hospitalbirth #homebirth #supportedbirth #birthpartner #birthinholland
Doulas continue support during the first hour afte Doulas continue support during the first hour after birth and usually stay around 2 hours afterwards.
She does what is needed from helping with breastfeeding to processing the birth to making you a bite to eat and generally helping those first hours go smoothly. 

When you are all settled and showered and ready to rest she will go home to rest and recover herself.
-
-
#worlddoulaweek #firstfeed #doulasupport #goldenhour
#douladelft #doularotterdam
#gotyourbackgirl #igotyou #coninueondersteuning #continualsupport #laboursupport #doulalife #birthdoula #doulalove #doulasofinstagram #hospitalbirth #homebirth #thuisbevalling #ziekenhuisbevalling #medischbevalling #womensupportingwomen
Do you know what ‘the doula effect’ is? Studi Do you know what ‘the doula effect’ is? 
Studies have shown that the continual support of the same one person during the whole birth process improves outcomes for mother and baby. 

Who doesn’t want that? 

The research shows that when doulas are present at a birth there is significantly less need for medicinal pain relief and more satisfaction with the whole experience. 

Sure your doula has lots of tricks of the trade but her main strength is purely her presence. It is like a super power. Doulas can sit with you for hours and bring a sense of calm and a quiet confidence into the space. 

Doulas affect the birth process positively. If doulas were a drug it would be unethical to use it!! 
-
-
#worlddoulaweek2022 #doulasupport #birthdoula #labourdoula #gotyourbackgirl #coninueondersteuning #continualsupport #laboursupport #doulalife #birthdoula #doulalove #doulasofinstagram #hospitalbirth #homebirth
At Birth in Holland we are all about doula’s. Th At Birth in Holland we are all about doula’s. This week is World Doula Week and we will be highlighting some of the benefits of doula support and answering your questions about doulas. 

Doulas are for everyone no matter how you want to birth. Doulas support all kinds of birth. Doulas are the only one in the room who’s sole job is to support you. Doulas support with no judgement. 
-
-
-
#worlddoulaweek2022 #doulasupport #welovedoulas #doula #doulalife #birthsupport #laboranddelivery #oncalllife #doulasforeverybirth
We are so used to googling everything. A question We are so used to googling everything. A question comes up and we google it, we want immediate information and we want it now. Google is always at our finger tips!

But when you are pregnant it can be scary to find out everything google says about what you are going through. This can lead to anxiety and often times uneccesary worry. Information is often misguided or sensational too. 

So know where to look, be careful of how much you read. 
Ask yourself these few questions: Is it wiser to ask a medical professional? Is the info evidence based? Is this making me more anxious? 
-
-
#evidencebasedpractice #information #bewise #modernwoman #mamatime
We cover all elements of fundamental first aid in We cover all elements of fundamental first aid in our ‘First Aid For Babies & Children’ course & also cover CPR.

CPR is an accredited, certificated workshop given by trained Nederlandse Reanimatieraad teachers and gives a certificate that is valid for 2 years.

Book for the next First Aid coming up this later this month. Sunday 26th March. Still a few spots available! 
-
#firstaidforbabies #cpr #safetyfirst #safehome #certificatefirstaid #newcourse #englishehbo #firstaidinenglish #expatfirstaid #ehbo
Hoping for a water birth or just planning to use w Hoping for a water birth or just planning to use water for pain relief? 
Water is the most underestimated form if pain management for birth. 

Here are some tips on how to manage expectations so you will end up looking back positively on your birth no matter how it went. 
-
-
-
#waterbirth #waterbaby #waterforpain #mindset #warmwaterrelax #labourtips #labortips #watergeboorte #waterbaby #doulaphotographer #skintoskincontact #firsthourafterbirth #hospitalbirth #homebirth #expatfamily #informedbirth #birthingoptions #birthcenterbirth
Your baby knows you already, yes you, Dads. They r Your baby knows you already, yes you, Dads. They recognise your voice, it is familiar to them. Even more so if you take the time to connect with them. They are already a little human being in the belly and can hear, although muffled. Make it a little less muffled for the baby and get up close and personal. 
You will reap the benefits when they are born as your voice will comfort and soothe them. 
-
-
-
#talktobaby #connection #babylove #waitingforbaby #hellobaby #family #connectinpregnancy
We get asked this question often: is it safe to ke We get asked this question often: is it safe to keep working out when pregnant?

For women who normally work out, run, do yoga every day before pregnancy and have a healthy all round fitness level, it is fine and important to keep it up. It is important to listen keenly to your body and when it needs to stop or rest. 

Having a good physical condition helps for an easier labour and good recovery after birth. 

For women who are not uber fit it is important to be active and do regular stretching to ease your labour and recovery. 

Don’t go crazy if it is not a regular habit, ease into it and build up to a daily stretch and walk. 
-
-
-
#fitpregnancytips #healthypregnancy #babyandme #goeasyonyourself #comfortablepregnancy #fitmamas #uberfit #healthymamas #moveyourbodyeveryday #expatmamas #baby #expatdelft #newmother
Load More Follow on Instagram

Sign up to keep up!

If you would like to receive our monthly news and be notified when there is a new blog online subscribe to our newsletter. We would love to keep you up to date.

Birth in Holland

Footer

Contact

Birth in Holland
Gerbrandylaan 36
2625LR Delft

info@birthinholland.com

KVK: 67260896
AGB code: 0800/3339
BTW: 856900990B01

Important info

Terms and Conditions & Privacy Policy

Birth in Holland

Providing courses, pregnancy & birth services for international families.

Copyright © 2023 · Birth in Holland